Fear & Changes

on April 20, 2014 in Musings
If you don’t try, you’ll never know.
If you never ask, the answer will always be ‘no.’
If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never get it.

I tried, I asked, and I went after it.  ‘It’ is a better position at the company where I have worked for almost fifteen years.

The phone call came in the early afternoon.  And, of course, I had just taken a huge bite of chicken.  The caller id hinted at what was to come.  I chewed twice, swallowed, and prayed I wouldn’t choke.

“I’d like to offer you the position.”

I got it!

I’m really good at the job I currently have.  It’s not a thankless job, but most of what I do isn’t going to turn any heads.  I like that my co-workers come to me with questions and that my manager gives me special projects.  But I’ve reached the top of this ladder.  No more money, no where to advance to.  The final blow was having to train the girl who was hired to lead our group.  They paid me less money to answer her questions than they paid her to ask them.  Ouch.  But that’s office politics.

Why am I afraid to take this new position?  Is it just the new computer programs?  No.  I can learn them.  I already know a couple of the people I will be working with and for.  That’s not my fear either.

It’s an irrational fear, like my fear of zombies.  I truly have nothing to be afraid of.

I can do this!

I can do this!

Am I nervous?  Oh, yeah.  But that will keep me on my toes and make me work harder to impress my new boss.  Because she will be my new boss.

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